New Years

Well here it is, the last day of the year. New Years Eve brings so many things to mind, all the memories of the past year, the past years, the past decades, all the New Years Eve parties spent with friends and family.

New Years Day brings as many things to mind, for those of us who try to do Resolutions (mine are pretty much the same every year, maybe a little different this year), we think of what we want to change going forward. The good things we want to do better, the bad things we really want to change, the new things we want to try, and the obvious things we hope for every year (I will try to exercise at least twice a week...).

But, this New Years there is a lot going through my mind, besides the obvious. Family and those that are not here this New Year and how I love the phone and internet to keep in touch with them. Friends who have left or lost touch. Friends that I miss that "connection" with. Friends that just aren't the same as they were at some other point, and how I miss those times. It seems like this was a year for friends for me.

I've realized a few friends at some point just become that person, there is no opening up to them, no searching and meaningful discussions, just chit chat. Some, I really miss the long hours spent chatting; while others, I'm glad to move forward. Then, there are new friends, new friends that have become a really big part of my world. Friends that are brand new and old friends that seem like new.

I've realized that there really is meaning in the old quote "Friends are here for a reason, a season or a lifetime." Sometimes all three, sometimes that "reason" is a all but too brief passing in the year. I love all the friends that have touched my life. And it's good to know that my family, who will always be here, are also my friends and have so much meaning in my life.

I just don't know why, but this year my Resolutions are all about friends and family. Trying to maintain and build up those relationships just seems so important all of a sudden. Not that it wasn't important before, but it just seems like a "weight" that I need to take care of all of a sudden. Taking hold of those that are important and finding ways to let them know it. If not everyday or every week, like I would like, then at least more often than I have in the past.

So there are my resolutions in an outlined sort of way. Although, my sisters resolutions were good to, just not something I really have a problem doing (taking a break from the housecleaning and business of life to play, I have always loved to play)! So beware all you friends... I will be bugging you! Love ya all, and Happy New Year!

Time of Year...

I just realized how tough it is this time of year to have loved ones far away. I've always been lucky to have most of my family nearby. This year my dear sis will be staying at home in Arizona, in the sunshine and warmth - I'm so envious, so I will be missing her and her family. My dear brother is serving our wonderful country overseas. He was in Iraq and now in Afghanistan, and I worry daily about him. My youngest baby still asks about his grandpa, Papa rest your soul - we miss you, and why Papa won't be having Christmas with us. And there are friends, friends that I have had for decades, friends that I've only had a year or more but have come to mean the world to me, that won't be around this year. They have family or other obligations and they will also be gone. They won't be here to share the season with me, to exchange gifts and stories, or to sit and watch the New Year come in. Sometimes, in this reflective time of year, I realize how lucky I am to have people that I can miss. I have these dear people in my life and for whatever reason that life pulls them away this time of year I will miss them, each and everyone. I will celebrate with those around me, and I will say a simple prayer for those that are celebrating the real Christmas in Heaven, I will say a prayer for those overseas and far away, and I will say a prayer for those right next to me and cuddled in my arms. I will close my eyes, and breathe deep and long, while listening to my favorite music of the season. I will have tears in my eyes as I reflect on the relationships that I have and have had. The friends that are here and then gone... The ones that break your heart and the ones that forever remain. I will choke back that tear in my throat, that lump that wants to choke me into a rambling wimp of tears, and I will smile. I will smile and look forward to the time they will all be hear around me again. I will try not to dwell on the sad, but just reflect and remember the good, the happy and those Christmas Pasts that make you forever thankful each year that those memories are worth all the rough times that you make it past. Christmas will forever grip our lives and bind us together with all the memories we've shared. I will be thankful for that. Change and new memories lay before us all. But there will always be those Christmas memories to look back on. Christmas will always know who we really are. The season naturally brings out the best in us. It brings generosity and sincerity. Christmas makes us remember the real reason that we have the season to celebrate and the future we all have to look forward to. Christmas will always be with each of us, while we may feel lonely or sad for a moment, Christmas will keep us close and show us those who need our love and those who love us still. I'm so glad it's Christmas...